FOMO. Otherwise known as Fuck Onions More Often. Or really Fear of Missing Out. The classic analogy for anyone who gets pissed off, scared, upset or turned on by missing out on the fun. Whether it be a really cool party, a meal out or committing genocide, FOMO is not a pleasant thing. A thing that can spur on negative emotions for people faster than every girl can run away during a game of kiss chase from the ugly, greasy, sweaty boy chasing them.
Everyone suffers from FOMO at some point. The fear really gets to some people. Some people just have to be at everything that their circle of friends are doing or anything they desire to be a part of. Even to the more extreme where some people will never miss out no matter how big or small the repercussions could be. It’s natural to get FOMO and shouldn’t be made out to be a big issue. Sometimes it may become a big issue but most of the time it’s not. It’s just wanting to be included which we all desire for. No one enjoys being excluded, no one enjoys feeling left out and no one enjoys being forgotten about like you’re Old Noah in the Notebook.
Despite how shit it is to miss out, we all sort of forget that it’s going to happen from time to time, we aren’t going to always get to be a part of things. It’s just a part of life. Yes it’s shit and yes it’s not a feeling desired for, but it’s something that has to be accepted unfortunately.
The acceptance of it all is the hardest part, when your bummed out self is sitting on the couch miserable, flicking through the channels aimlessly whilst visualising how you could be having a fab time bending and snapping like Elle (legally blonde reference) with all the lads. It’s not pleasant but it’s going to pass, it may just take a day or two depending on how bummed out you are from your FOMO. The problem is when it doesn’t pass and you’re still bitter about it for a long time afterwards. This is when it can lead to problems and potential friendship breakers. Yet, it’s not always the worst thing, it’ll help you in the long run. The longer you’re bummed out by it the more it could maybe help you.
When I was a young whipper snapper in my teens, the teenage years where going to parties was the thing, I was constantly having FOMO and dealing with the emotions of it all. It all stemmed from this group of ‘friends’ I had who I hung about with. Every weekend with these ‘friends’ there seemed to be a party or a simple underage drinking sesh and every weekend I wasn’t invited to it. I would always have to hear about it and how great it was and I’d be miserable just hearing about it, whilst I was scratching my arse in my room at home. It all eventually got too much, I cracked and was a little vocal about my displeasure to never being invited to attend these such illustrious events. Yes underage drinking and spewing up the alphabetty spaghetti you had earlier is an illustrious event. This all led me to just not hanging around or speaking to many of these people. In the short run it was not fun but, in the long run it was a good thing.
Being excluded, having the constant FOMO and unwanted feelings from, it lead me to knowing my self worth amongst these people. I realised I wasn’t that wanted by them or even in some ways liked by these people, I was the splinter in the big toe that no one wanted. Sometimes you have to just sit back and think about am I wanted and liked by these people? It’s a rough ponder but it’s gotta be done humans. If you can spot that you’re amongst people you’re not valued by, then you got to get away from them like they’ve got wild rabies and want to kiss you.
Now that doesn’t mean just because you missed out on something once means all your friends like you as much as Iranians like America just now. It’s when it’s constant, you should maybe start to think about your worth amongst your friends. Work out if you’re actually their friend, do they value you, would they check on you in times of need and would they suck your index finger better when you got a booboo. If the answer is no to most of them including the last one then maybe it’s best you start to drift away from these ‘friends’ and find your new tribe. Knowing your self worth amongst friends is important, knowing your valued and wanted is key.
FOMO will always suck. The emotions from it will also always suck. However just remember it’s a natural thing to experience, you’re not alone in the experience, just know your self worth and your value amongst people. Plus sitting on your couch eating cheese puffs whilst watching documentaries on paint is way more riveting than whatever you’re getting FOMO over.
Swankie – 23, Scotland. Loveable Loser.
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